If I just lay here...

Why is it that the most popular shows are about the completely plausible life. People in med school, in high school, friends in a city. Really I think it is the fact the people are normal. They fall in and out of love, have joys and sorrows and we are there for it all. And we hurt with them, and we laugh with them and we get excited and talk to our friends about it, but who has the courage, the fortitude to actually live.

Maybe it is better to get the craziness out, the really rash and emotional, with the fiction so when it comes time to really make the important decisions, job, spouse, house etc, we can make a good one. Maybe life is better lived objectively with a solid financial portfolio. Even as I write that I can feel my heart twist inside me.

No! It says. Life is more than Dawson could film it to be, more than the gilmore girls can talk about or miranda can work out in the empty room of a hospital. Life is real and the pain cuts all the way to the core of your heart. And sometimes you just lie there bleeding, hurting. But its better to have real pain than a false happiness or even security.

Thanks Hollywood, but I'll forego the hot new drama. I'll sit on the steps or the dorm and work out the pain from the girl who said God won't let her date me, and I'll cling to my buddies when I fear beats love on halloween and I'll sure as hell keep dancing even when she runs back to Oklahoma. Ha.

Maybe my life will be epic, maybe simple. But in any case, it will be real and no one will ever be able to say I never tried, never went big, always played it safe. And most importantly, I'll know.